I think happy thoughts

3 Tips for Parenting with Joy

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Positive Parenting

How do you stay positive when your child’s behaviors are driving you crazy? This is a tough question. Every parent knows that they have had a point in their lives when they were pushed to yell, scream, or worse because they were so worn down and did not know what else to do.  The same cycle seems to happen over and over where your child’s emotions and your emotions get out of control. This is something that happens often but doesn’t have to.

If you take a step back and start to look at the cycle of what is triggering you and your child, you will be able to better regulate your own emotions. And you will be able to start teaching your child how to regulate his/her own emotions.  Positive parenting is about looking for ways to change the situation into a more positive one instead of continuing to punish bad behaviors. You have to start looking at the big picture and do a little detective work.

Figuring out what is triggering your child’s bad mood may not be obvious at first but look at the patterns. What time of day does it usually happen, what is your child usually doing, and who is around when it happens? These types of questions help you to get more information about the cycle of behaviors that are happening. Then you can come up with a plan to intervene earlier on before the behaviors are out of control and your child is having a tantrum and you are screaming.

It’s also important to factor in your own triggers so that you know when you are getting overwhelmed. You can get better at taking a break and then talking to your child in a more calm and rational manner. This helps the child understand what behavior you don’t like and takes away the emotional reaction to your mood.

The key to any new approach in parenting is to plan ahead, practice, and allow for mistakes. Be willing to stick with it even if you don’t see results right away. If you have been doing the same type of parenting for years then a new approach won’t change things overnight, but it will change things. Positive approaches are very effective and leave you feeling good about what you are teaching your child.


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Positive Thinking

I think happy thoughts

Why is thinking happy thoughts important? Well it may seem that it doesn’t matter what your thoughts are it’s your actions that count. But I have found that the more negative my thoughts are the worse my day is and the worse my outlook on life is. If I “look at the silver lining” or “think of the bright side” or any other cute way of saying think positively I find that my day is much better. Well we all know that this is not an easy thing to do and especially when you feel you have a legitimate reason for being upset. The problem is that your brain gets stuck on those negative thoughts and then it’s so much harder to get away from them. It takes a lot of practice to think positively. It’s not easy to find something that can change your outlook on a situation. However…

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Positive Thinking

Why is thinking happy thoughts important? Well it may seem that it doesn’t matter what your thoughts are it’s your actions that count. But I have found that the more negative my thoughts are the worse my day is and the worse my outlook on life is. If I “look at the silver lining” or “think of the bright side” or any other cute way of saying think positively I find that my day is much better. Well we all know that this is not an easy thing to do and especially when you feel you have a legitimate reason for being upset. The problem is that your brain gets stuck on those negative thoughts and then it’s so much harder to get away from them. It takes a lot of practice to think positively. It’s not easy to find something that can change your outlook on a situation. However doing so will increase the likelihood that you move past the upsetting event quicker and are able to find more positive thoughts in the future. When I first started trying this it was hard and often times I laughed at some of the phrases I heard like “fake it until you make it.” I could not figure out why someone would want to pretend to be happy (fake it). Well I tried it because I couldn’t ask others to do it if I wasn’t willing to try it. After a lot of practice, I finally understood why this concept works for some people.  I also tried out various positive thoughts or sayings that resonated with me. This is a lot of the work that I do with people in counseling sessions. It’s awesome when someone finds that they no longer need therapy because they can “think on the bright side” or find their own solutions and no longer need a therapist!
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